A Semi-Response to Cam

On the subject of masks, I think you’ve kinda got yourself in an Othello situation there, Cam. I don’t know if you’ve ever read Othello, but I’m referring to a particular situation. It is a situation where something important in your life is going well, but as soon as you have a small doubt about it, the thought begins eating away at you until you doubt everything you know. My personal favorite thing to do in those kinds of situations is to just compress all those questions and worries into a small little ball and then pretend it isn’t there until I forget about it. Not to brag, but my memory is really bad, so this is quite an effective method for me. As Freud said, “the repressed always returns,” but as I say, “not if you don’t write your return address.” This is not to make fun of you for the predicament that you find yourself in, though. I used to think about the concept of masks a lot. I still do. It’s fascinating, but I think that it can be very discouraging. I don’t know who I am “underneath,” but I also don’t care. If you don’t have expectations for yourself, anything can happen. This often leads to very interesting conversations and interactions. I surprise myself sometimes. I think it’s interesting to think about it, but I never got anywhere. This is probably due to the fact that I even mask myself from myself, so it’s a catch-22. It might help not to anchor yourself to anything, but then again, a rolling stone gathers no moss. I guess I’m rambling, but I think you brought up a very interesting topic.

Otherwise, my life has been pretty uneventful.

I’m really bad at these blog posts because I don’t really remember what I do. I think I’ll probably start writing blog posts about stuff that I didn’t actually do. If I’m lucky, it’ll be more entertaining than my current blog posts.

Actually, I just remembered something that happened. A few days ago, I got a facetime call (or whatever it is) from my sister, who is in Florida looking at colleges with my dad. I ignored it because I was watching a movie with someone, and my sister is a tad annoying (not actually, but kind of). Apparently she texted me afterwards, but I didn’t see the text until an hour after she had sent it. It was:

“This is an emergent”

“I think dad is dying”

I asked her what was going on, but after she didn’t answer, I called my mother, hoping she’d have more information. My mom had not heard about it, but within five minutes, she had called every hospital within 100 miles of their location. None of them had my father, which was bad news, but it was also, in a way, good news. All we could do was wait for either my sister or dad to call or text back. About an hour later, I got a text from my dad. Apparently my sister had sent those texts to get me to answer the facetime call. They went to bed shortly after she sent those texts, so they didn’t hear the calls or texts for a while. Anyway, that was odd.

Sincerely,

Adrian